so i woke up this morning thinking _____ was in bed with me. . .but it was only a half eaten sonic burger
Best moment of my life. I just got a text from some random number that said i can't wait to touch you. Her name is kiara and she had the wrong number.
she needs to learn to take compliments like she takes dicks.
watching hot guy on train scrolling with his blackberry's track ball... o to be that track ball...
He gave Paula abdoul a run for her crazy
Sandwiches are there for you when porn isn't.
the night got glorious when you tried to do an upside down keg stand with a near empty key and dropped it on your face
great idea involving lots of fake blood and face paint, call me tomorrow.
I called him daddy. To his face. Somewhat sober. What more could I do?
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
then he grabbed my tit and yelled "FOR NARNIA!!" then dove into my vag. i think I will do him again strictly for the entertainment value
I just realized that you're going to be drunk for daylight savings time again. Godspeed.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
Tomorrow night, I am putting you In my trunk. No excuses we have waited forever for this.
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