found out what b.m.t stands for.
what did you think?
bread, meat, tomatoes, but then i realized that could be practically any sub.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
So then she just shoved applesauces in her pocket and started talking about she needed to find her friends.
you didn't get her number why?
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
On campus. Grown men in women's sexy bee costumes. Complete with legwarmers. This cannot be real life.
Admit it. It's a brilliant plan with hundreds of possible repercutions.
Understatement of the year.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
Seriously. What did you do to me. You have a monstercoooooock.
I can't believe I just typed monstercoooooock. Twice.
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
i mostly like you because you have a nice nose and that's an important trait to pass on to my future children
If we try hard enough and believe in ourselves, we can still make it to Wendy's before they close
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
I guess what I'm trying to get to is that my dog sneezed on my dick earlier and its really taken the joy out of my evening.
I threw my back out having sex last night. I don’t know whether to high five myself for a job well done or cry because I’m old.
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
