This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
How wet are you?
Ever heard of a U-boat?
i ate 2 chicken nuggets and puked out 5. that doesn't even make mathematical sense
i just lost my virginity for the 9th time. when will guys stop believing that nonsense line
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
Off topic, but is it sad that Matthew and I are calculating how much sex we need to have in order to work off a taco bell burrito?
Dude cabbage spilt on the floor, and now danielles rolling it. Happy st party's day.
I wish your snatch was here
If my snatch could sprout wings I'd fly to you
the best part of college is nobody can tell me not to eat six toaster strudels and jerk off in the shower
I just sent my ex off to a party, threw a condom at him, and told him to make good choices.
Wine is the only reason I'm making it in the real world
Look, if this is a cop, just lemme know that Mike is ok. Fuckin all star game
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
Can we be gay Bert and Ernie for Halloween?
I got a discount on the lube for giving the cashier focaccia bread from work.
Randomize
