haha i took a picture of myself naked on her camera
She didnt have a camera...
Nice meating you last night
Not a typo
My mom just drunkenly told me i was conceived in the back of a car, at a Bon Jovi concert.
you were grabbing cocks left and right
you literally grabbed sam's dick and said, "who's cock is this?!"
nothing this campus sells is worth it. not even sex.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
she left around the point i tried to tie her hair around my dick
I thought that u needed a break due the fact that your nipples were bleeding
I feel like death gave me a hand job
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Where are you?! I require drunk, males and possibly crying. Vomiting is optional and/or optimal as is karaoke.
I just shit a hot coal. Pretty sure it's that fireball shot from yesterday.
Was he good-huge or like "what the fuck do i do with this"-huge
And I just want you to know I got myself into this mess. I gotta get myself out. Plus, don't you only need one kidney?
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
Randomize
