You know, sometimes I seriously doubt your commitment to sparkle motion.
ok think of it like jelly beans. if you can learn to like the licorice ones, youll always have lots of them because no one else wants them. its the same with fat chicks
She punched my vomit. In midair. Back into my mouth.
with your vagina and my liver, anything is possible
note to self: an IV pole is no substitute for a stripper pole. Written it on my ankle cast.
Do what your heart wants. . .
My heart wants to rip his balls off and tie therm to his head using his penis
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Milk that cash cow for all the shots she's worth
this is the first time i'm angry at someone with so much boobs. she like managed to break my glass and my phone with one glorious swing
As pissed as she was, you would've thought I was trying to get back into his pants instead of his booze collection.
you know you're a stoner girl when you get a callus from your grinder
Can we relax the "married man" rule just once?
OH MY GOD did i pee on you?!
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
We didn't get home until 4 am. Her mom let us in, confessed that she had sex with someone she worked with and said he had a small penis. I love this family.
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