I used to have a blog that was basically all about ****** and all of his sexual misadventures
I mean it made tucker max look like a fucking alterboy
But unfortunatley his mom did a google search and found it
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
I just miserably failed my own drug test. At least I know what a positive will look like when I give them to the employees tomorrow.
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
You're sure you don't want to come? I'm pretty sure there is going to be "Pin the Tail on the Baby".
If he breaks up with me, your job is to keep me drunk and make sure I don't sleep with anyone. Ok?
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
im going to hold it over his head for all of eternity. when his children are born i am going to go to the hospital as his wife is giving birth and shove the picture in the childs face, so the first time they see their father is in a drunken stupor looking like a jackass.
what the hell is that chicken wire thing she's holding?
An artistic expression of her stupidity.
So he drunk messaged me last night telling me he wants a baby. Think I should call his bluff?
Not exactly hook line and sinker right away, but I'll give him a second chance. I should sext him me in my blue shark onesie.
Fuck you know you drunk when you start signing the Masson impossjvke song to entourage yourself to pee
I wrote him a note at the end of the final. I'm hoping I can flirt my way in to an A or B
My autocorrect won't finish pterodactyl for me and I'm feeling personally attacked.
I fished a Couples Masturbation DVD out of somebody’s trash and kept it. That’s how desperate I am.
Randomize