i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Does your gf have any friends she can hook me up with?
Better looking than her though please.
It's going to take a while to see a dick pic that I enjoy more than richs helicopter video
I have a question: does pizza dipped in chili sound good or am I just really high?
Sweet and genuine is kinda lame. I'm more of a bust all over your face and hair kinda guy.
Uhm the hair is off limits bro, conditioner can only go so far.
Bro? You just made it a target.
Why am I always the sober one?
Cause you're the only one with any sort of self control. It's kinda your super power...
Waking up to find your mom holding your birth control pills and telling you I suggest you take this
I think my teeth are moving, they feel like people.
All I've done is masturbate and drink while being home from college.
Hey! How are you feeling? Still preferring soup over sex?
when you wake up naked in a bed with glowsticks, a rolled ankle, a hangover, and a condom; alone. you wonder shit
I want you to know. From the bottom of my heart, that you are a great friend, a beautiful person, and one of my favorite people in this world. But if you ever send me that many messages again at 4am I swear to God, I will push you in from of a fast running rhino
so how was it...?
sadly not as impressive as one might expect from a division one athlete. he lacked the stamina i had hoped for, and by lacked i do mean he fell asleep while he was still inside me. an epic wtf moment, i know.
we're tipping the strippers with chocolate coins.
It’s the universal cock block of this decade
FUCK THE COCKBLOCK 19
Randomize
