the thought of Anne Coulter teabagging Dick Cheney kills me everytime.
I don't know how this happened but I got an email thanking me for being a Waffle House regular. HOW DO THEY KNOW?? Maybe I need to stop going there shitfaced.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
so i gave him head in the movie theater last night. thought we were alone til I heard the clapping from the other side of the theater after he'd finished.
Funny. I made out with his brother for the first time in a bathroom too.
As long as he sees me topless I don't care. Redemption. REEEDDDEMMMPPPTTIIIOOONNNNN
last night he took my thong off with his teeth... god bless champagne
You emptied out your taco and asked the lady for a refill...and then you continued to carry out a full conversation SCREAMING
Apparently it is impossible to get kicked out of taco bell....I'll try harder next time
Here's how he asked the pregnant girl for a cigarette. Hey yo prego throw me a square. Not joking.
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
he fucked me with his goalie mask on. it was like sleeping with Darth Vader
im In safeway buying a bottle of Ciroc in short shorts at 3:00 pm on a Monday, yeah I don't know either.
I just talked this guy out of hooking up with me and gave him relationship advice. Am I a good person now?
I'm trying to secure Christmas dick. Idgaf if he has strep or not.
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
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