I just saw a stripper wear a tube top around her floppy gut. God bless Michigan.
You know you have a great job when you need a DD home from work at 6pm.
Preparing for thanksgiving at home now by chugging bourbon. Less than a month to train!
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
no, forget the keg and come see this. prego pants here is dunking chicken nuggets into pudding and crying over a cat show on animal planet.
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
No dude, he just dipped his cigarette info ranch dressing and lit it. He's said he normally doesn't do that but it's Memorial Day.
The walk of shame is a lot easier when I'm at a music festival and it's 12 feet from his tent to my tent
You are living the dream.
I'm seeing double so when I get home can we have a threesome?
it's too much effort for something that isn't food.
I told the person I was on the phone with to hold on while I looked for my phone. I think it's time to stop doing dabs.
His eyefucking isn't even normal eyefucking; it's eye anal.
went out to hit golf balls, ended up doing splits at the bar. you're a bad influence.
He listens to me complain and in return I send him naked pictures. It's a win win situation
Literally been in their house 5 minutes and I've projectile vomited all over the bathroom wall. The dog licked it up though so I think it's cool.
Randomize
