But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
Having dinner with my dad, watching the news and some AIDS prevention ad comes on. My dad then kindly informs me that he doesn't enjoy the feel of condoms.
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Sundays have taken on a whole new meaning when I'm not in bed with an excruciating hangover.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
I just puked so hard I pissed myself. Outta my ass. I just won hangover of the century.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Hey guy that stepped on my foot, don't slap my ass to apologize.
God, you're amazing. I just want to hang out with you in the nude and watch Monty Python movies whilst we quip about how comedians just aren't as funny anymore.
Credit for originality. Points off for a mild to moderate creepy factor.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Because drinking and showering don't go hand in hand. There that's my PSA of the day.
He was having this drunk emotional breakdown and I was just trying to cheer him up but instead fell and dumped the whole pickle jar on me
It was cool though because he was fine afterwards and somehow I convinced them I did it on purpose...
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
How's moving going?
Uh, we're on the way to the store to buy more booze
Randomize
