Dont worry, she is sitting right next to me. She is making it clear she wants to scissor
i found literally half of a double sided dildo in my shower. i guess someone went home happy.
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Also just realized how inappropriate it looks to other drivers to finish bottles of cheap champagne at stoplights
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
all im saying is that if he was a normal person, he would have fucked me by now.
Its like the unofficial aniversary of the loss of her virginity. And I will be giving tours of the spot they did it in and showing how I'm serious when I say the grass doesn't grow there anymore.
I'm using the bullet from my cock ring to massage out my tmj lock jaw from giving too much head.
You rolled around in the grass BEFORE we went in and said it was because "ladies love that eau de earth"
The bachelorette started when I opened the door and they threw a few dozen dildos at me.
you haven't really lived until you are in a situation where your vagina is hanging out
I don't know why I bit your face last night but I'm sorry .
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
HE LEFT ME THE DAY AFTER I LET HIM PEE ON ME. If you date him after that, I'll leave the fucking PLANET.
Randomize
