I may have discovered that porn hub is on my top visited sites during class this morning.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
The frequency that you give me blue balls couldn't be healthy.
I have a question, if it paid really well, like ridiculously well, would you be a restaraunts under the table resident blowjob girl?
Dude I think my special talent is falling in drunkenly falling in front of a cop and getting away. This is the second time.
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Yeah. You can ask him out. We're just fuck buddies. My vagina will be sad but your heart can be happy.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
Running my fingers through my hair is like that scene from Patch Adams where the girl goes swimming in a pool of spaghetti. I love molly.
i woke up this morning put my hand under the pillow and there was a banana there
she started chasing me through the forest like a horny serial killer
Do not take the D yet, he needs to be worth it. Your Vagina is GOLD.
IM FILLED WITH SANDWICHES AND SELF LOATHING
Can’t. Tonight’s a netflix and dick night
Randomize
