batman just walked across the sidewalk
lay off the drugs
no for real he was wearing a cape
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
everytime he calls himself the maxipad master i can't help but wonder what costume that would involve.
They should make Jack Daniels chap stick
the ex, the guy i cheated on the ex with and the rebound are about to form a beer pong team at my party. is it bad i feel accomplished my pussy brought their union together?
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
After it was shut down sean literally made out with four separate girls between the 100 feet to our house. It was a rampage.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
Most girls get hit on with a $7.00 drink. You get hit on with a $750K plane.
Just saw a couple chasing each other on lawn mowers. Oh South Knoxville.
Thinking about licking your asshole. And hugs and stuff too I guess.
I seriously thought Satan had his hand up my asshole and was pulling out my soul. Never. Again.
I suppose writing him up is more professional than keying his car.
I think I deserve an award for the breakup text I sent him. Like a pulitzer prize or a donut or something.
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