I'm drinking on the job... HEAVILY
nut hugger
Swine flu is the new snow day.
some random kid just walked into our apartment with two cases... I don't know who he is but I like him
My penis hasn't been this frustrated since I was like 13 and I awkwardly got boners at school dances
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
I let a naked juice spill down my leg for like 30 minutes bc i thought i was hallucinating that my leg was cold.
I'm confused as to why I have a picture of your boobs in response to a photo of my father
Wait, just ask him if can you can join in. You haven't lived until you've taken part in a threesome with your father...or so I've heard
I need to shower three times. First to be clean, second to wash off all sins, and third will classify as baptism.
I'm gonna be the best dressed mother fucker to ever get kicked out of that damn bar.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
So how do u get your coat out of the coat room when someone is fucking on it?
Randomize
