My mom caught just caught me jerking off...in her room.
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
she's googling pictures of Freddy Mercury and whispering 'I'm ready'
Lauren she was gnawing on a dresser. Gnawing. On. A. Dresser.
She's a virgin AND a minister's daughter. We're one schoolgirl outfit from the dear penthouse trifecta
It was pathetic and I was covered in butter
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Who is Katie and why do we have her birthday cake?
He told me I was the only person he wanted to fuck in his rental mini van. Thats so romantic for a fuck buddy relationship.
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
I was figuring I'd break up with her after work, but before Taco Tuesday
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He's all enlightened and liberal. My next beefcake will be much more Neanderthal.
She's walking down the sidewalk with a notebook, a pencil, and a box of cheez its while yelling profanities at small animals.... I'm going 2 ask her where she was before this.
Randomize
