your room smells of hookers.
And success
I figure if he loans me money i only owe him sex for the rest of the summer before i pay him back, right?
I cant video chat with you tonight, my parents are home
r u implying that im some kind of v-chat prostitution whore?
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
I found out that all you need to write a 12 page paper is adderall and twizzlers
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
Dude she gave you head while I was in the closet, we've passed the "awkward" phase.
I am going to go Miley Cyrus crazy if I don't get sex soon
Headline in the alligator: young zeta goes berserk after lack of sex and is found naked swinging from wrecking ball on university ave, refuses to get down until sex partner is found
ill dress up as a sperm donor and you can go as the cup....
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
I'm going to need you to stop harassing my professor on Twitter when you're drunk.
He fucked me so hard my contacts fell out! Didnt know that was possible.
Get your heels and tits on! I’m not wasting a Brazilian because his fucking kid ate paste or Legos and ruined an afternoon suite sex and room service
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