"what do u think of parents raising kids to be peeping toms" said guy on bus 2 me
He just bought a 100-pack of condoms of Amazon. My vagina is already tired.
his mom found me in the closet hiding and the only thing i could think of was to sit there and wave.
...and all my boxers are outside in the snow because????
I expect to be treated like a lady. Even If your sticking it in my ass.
He sent me a picture of myself smashed completely butt naked passed out on the couch and said "at least I'll have these memories"
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
He asked me the next morning if he fell asleep inside of me. Drunk is an understatement.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
I went to Christian school in the 90s. I can finger blast anything, but dignity.
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
I called plan parenthood at 407 am... Guess I was thinking ahead
Randomize