what do you have against ST
DO NOT ABBREVIATE LIKE YOU AND STAR TREK ARE FRIENDS.
We have a vodka soaked ShamWow with your name on it.
Spotted: jayne dropping her cigarettes in a puddle...then picking them back up and putting them in her pocket. If i ever get that desperate, stop talking to me
It's just like soggy cereal, but cancerous
so whenever I text yeah my phone automatically corrects it to yeahhhheeehhyeahyeahh .. too much party in the USA?
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
There's a very real possibility that I'll wake up in your uncle's driveway.
my professor saw me buying beer for the super bowl and said go patriots. thats how i know im getting an A in his class.
I'm petty sure you said "hold on let me make my nipples hard, they look better"
I was expecting it to be of the "I am your vagina's reckoning" caliber.
Goodbye spring break, hello depressing video on AIDS.
What am I supposed to say? "Hi new uncle in law once I tried cocaine in Mexico and every once in a while i motorboat strangers. so happy to be a part of your family"
Okay. So I've done lines off a bible. But that's just for the sake of being cliché.
I'm missing my left shoe, and there's a note on my foot (in my handwriting) that says "HAHA BITCH" Any explanation for this?
And I wasn't CONVICTED of a felony, I just committed one
Bringing my mom Taco Bell and weed. I'm such a good daughter
Randomize
