Riding a fattie is like riding a scooter, its ok just not in public.
So... I just got back from the chiropractor... And he said I have a slight neck injury from head banging too much. Fuck yes.
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
considering how much of last night I don't remember and the amount of ones laying on my desk right now, it's safe to say I'm concerned
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
They tried. Someone started to yell beer shower but he spun around and punched them in the mouth before they even finished saying beer. He's a fast little drunk.
I told him I'd go cook him breakfast, but ended up passing out on the kitchen floor in the fetal position spooning the dog
Dude it was bad... like you fell asleep around the toilet after drinking from the back tank bad.
I got to the party and found your shoes in a bag of Funyuns. You weren't even there.
We work out, have really intense sex, and then eat cereal marketed for children. We have a system, okay?
Sorry I crashed a riding mower into your garage door. No hard feelings??
My god imagine how much cum is in that astroturf
Fuuuuuck dude, he’s got #Excel in his Facebook bio; I’m screaming
SOOOOOO I just attempted to go to the gym, hungover. Ended up throwing up in the bathroom. I hope people think I'm just working out really hard
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