How many pudding cups do I have to eat for it to count as dinner?
4.
I think this dress is screaming I want a birthday 3some with two moderately attractive guys. I hope.
we had to stop you from eating moldy cake.. twice.
In a car. Threw up in my mouth. Haven't said a word in 10 minutes.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
There's something very strange about masturbating in a hotel room. I feel like I'm cheating on my room...
I really have to stop having sex with people I sell drugs to...it feels unprofessional
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
He caught a cramp during sex and I was like "do you want me to get you a banana?" And he responded with "I'll give you a banana" and kept going. I'm marrying him.
I think it's getting serious, we started a jigsaw puzzle together.
So I have three weeks to get rid of his girlfriend and fuck him senseless before he goes to jail
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I don't want to be flamboyant (says the guy who bought a hot pink suit to be a flamingo for Halloween)--but I don't mind being a little extra.
I’ve got a closet full of cosplay outfits and horny boytoy to help me ride out this pandemic
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