You are a beautiful, beautiful young lady. Your heart is made of tissue, blood and love. I will call you very soon, Princess Sophia.
yeah for some reason your penis didn't fit in my mouth the other day
Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
I'm going to skip that pointless convo with Mark, stick with the "we're talking" status, and bone barely legal, borderline gay, preppy guys on the DL.
Yea it's a sex scar. But if anyone asks I tripped up carpeted stairs
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Seriously just confirmed via our bathroom scale that a keg weighs 170lbs
Im about to get a baby alligator stoned, what are you doing with your life?
I've got enough liquor to do one of two things on Friday: 1.) Drink myself into a coma or 2.) lay in bed a drunk and cry lonely mess. Happy Valentines Day.
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'M GOING TO FUCK AN ENTIRE ORCHESTRA AND NOTHING CAN STOP ME
The band club does not count as an orchestra
Know we haven't talked but having an orgy party on the 20th if you're interested. If not, disregard this text.
Who is this?
now to finish some work and then i think i'll work out. or garden. or at the very least I'll continue eating frozen grapes and take more drugs
you put your dick on my shoulder this morning like it was a fucking parrot
I'm at work behind the bar and just washed my mouth out with rumple bc I don't have a toothbrush. This may be a new low.
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