we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
I just asked my hair stylist how many percocets she'd do my hair for.
my hippie aunt just sent me some brownies with a note saying not to eat them under any circumstances until finals are over. excited.
I never thought I'd say this, but there is a life threatening amount of rumpleminz in our freezer
From one hot mess to another... Get it together.
You gotta start bringing a flask to work so you can get a head start
Possibly a very genius or very terrible idea...
Currently hiding in the shower from the RA and my elbow turns it on. Showers and Ciroc don't mix..
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
Honestly I have a huge freedom boner right now and if I came it would be red white and blue
Dude I was walking down the street and threw up in a plastic cvs bag. Tequila wins again.
I'm pretty sure the guy on the dance floor with crutches just smacked me in the butt with one. Do you think he's flirting?
You had all day to plan ahead & get mixers, so whose fault is this sobriety?
My breath smells like dick and biscuits..
Randomize
