$4 taco and $400 parking ticket. i am not a cheap date.
Was going to watch Bolt. Fucked a stranger instead. Details later.
So you didn't like Bolt?
sooo i think when i get back from rothbury i should probably take a pregnancy test
but you would be showing by now. i'd just save the money and wait for a large crap in 6 months that starts crying. then you'll know.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
My dealer, who also happens to be a male stripper, just invited me to watch him perform tonight. Boundaries buddy, boundaries.
I dont think punching her boob is the type of reverse psychology that will get her to blow you.
If I come over right now will you promise to distract your grandpa in the morning so I don't have to do the walk if shame with 1940's style judgement?
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
he told me he was watching a movie and he'd be over later and i asked how long. he said 8 inches give or take. you cease to amaze me with the guys you set me up with.
Bob the builder, bob the uilder bob the builder bbbbbbbbbbbbbbbbjbbbbbiotch!pp!!!!
my mom was in labor with me for 32 hours, it's only fair to start drinking now.
I just saw a girl on crutches doing a walk of shame. She is either super dedicated, or her night didn't go as planned.
I slept with an Israeli and a Palestinian in the same day. It feels wrong.
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
I found my limit. I will not, in fact, blow my 78 year old professor for an A in his class.
Randomize
