names aren't important. just tell him all you want is a lil make out sesh and keep it moving.
5 Four Lokos being cheaper than a case should be illegal.
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
come find me. Outside the bar we were just in waving my syringe in the air
I woke up in a hospital at three in the morning only to realize my pee is now going to be orange. I've grown to realize I've made all the right decisions
I told him I was on the pill and it was OK to fire away. I want to never have to wear panty house or ever go to an office again. This is my early retirement plan. I want half of his NBA money.
she just nodded and said "yeah, I'd fuck him for a reese's peanut butter cup". it's so nice to know I'm not the biggest whore living here
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
this is the first time in over a year I had a pregnancy scare and actually would have known who the father was. I guess this is what adulthood feels like.
You should really look at your snapstory. It has us screaming " MANSION DICK! SUCK IT! FUCK IT!" By the way im currently in a mansion and need you to pick me up
He tried to get me to go back to his place on the condition that he has 6 cats. I was very tempted but I said no. Hoping to go see the cats tomorrow
You yell at me for being attracted to older guys and you're over here condoning murder
My debit card was between my ass cheeks when i woke up. i vaguely remember putting it there for safe keeping
Randomize
