i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
Is it weird being in the house without any roommates?
Nah, just masturbating louder
i would eat my own dick if it were covered in nutella
My mind hurts. I feel like I drank sand yesterday.
This is all my moms fault. She shouldn't have encouraged my weird fascinations as a child
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Please delete that video of me blowing you. I will repay you with 100 blowjobs even better than the one I gave you during that video. Please. I am gonna be a grandma one day.
Of course it was necessary for me to call the strip club and ask what their shower policy is. Smelled like she was wiping her ass with my eyebrows during that dollar dance.
It's like you're a magic genie of bad timing
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
I'm surprised I don't have a permanent face imprint between my boobs.
It all started because he put my damn phone in his pants. By his crotch nonetheless.
Well I woke up and my arm was bleeding. And my blood is on the wall in the hallway.
Umm
No idea. I blame fireball.
Valid.
Dude I was tripping acid when she was crying and I literally couldn't defend myself
You spilled your drink, and we laughed so hard my boobs popped out of my shirt.
Randomize
