i'm like carrie bradshaw but prettier and with a penis
He lets me throw up in him even if i do it mistakeily- erica talking about the toilet
just heard some guy walking down the street say "butt sex in the sun"
go get him tiger.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I'm sorry. We set two Christmas trees on fire. Also the neighbor's yard. Also ours.
like the only thing i remember is bringing a piece of toast to the bar...
I woke up naked dangling by my feet from the balcony over his foyer. He's officially my new favorite booty call.
Oh and probably wearing a life jacket instead of clothes didn't help things either
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I know, my friend Erin took me into the bathroom at work and poured pickle juice on me.
Sean slept in the bushes beside my house again. Any reason he kept screaming/slurring 'it was all a bunch of goddamn lies' through out the night?
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
No biggie, just trying to keep my liver function in the green
I used your vibrator when you were out of town. Now I know why you always come out of your room smiling.
I honestly have no desire to wear clothes around you
I have that affect on people
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