I'm drinking till I'm someone else's problem
Will you Wikipedia Vin Diesel? Is he gay? It's important...
Check if I'm alive tomorrow. If not, tell my parents I died happy and that there's a gay cheerleader in the spare bedroom
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Yeah but if I do that, I'd have to buy my own stomach pump for the house. That doesn't seem like a great thing to have sitting on the coffee table.
Should study in library more often, procrasturbating is less of an option.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
just woke up on the floor of my shower...it was still runnning
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
I refuse to fake an orgasm. If I'm dating him, he better work for that shit.
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
I swear my vagina needs to be taken away from me when I drink.
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