And now we're talking about squeezing babies out of vaginas...
Is it bad everytime a fat person orders fraps I want to tell them to slow their rolls
It's kind of sad that your greatest accomplishment today is that you stood up and didn't fall down.
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
Just got an Edible Arrangement my parents sent me for my birthday. Time to marinate some fruit in vodka.
Woke up this morning with a note saying "great sex, see you never". Why can't I meet more women like her?
Im about to shotgun a beer using my mother's knitting needles. home sweet home.
I just helped a group of highschool stoners find a safe place to smoke I feel like a responsible rolemodel
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Im eating these cheese filled pretzels. So good. Theres jizz dripping out places i didnt even know i had.
I have a theory that years from now they will be with women who despise me because of what I trained their husbands to like.
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
I love getting kicked out of places. Its like winning a little league game
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
So if you wanna come get your pants you can. But you have to come in your boxers. Rules are rules!
Randomize
