They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
I know this request is pointless but you two please try to keep the drinking and drug use to a minimal, I have bail money so write my number on your arm and a "if found call", wear a life jacket and act like a responsible 28 year old please.
Do you have any pix of it limp? I wanna see the metamorphosis, like a cock caterpillar turning into a giant beautiful cock butterfly!
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
I went to the bar saying i wasn't going to drink that much. I forgot sobriety might as well be some mythical creature when you're with Holleey
Omg just had weirdest best cab advice situation ever. I kissed the cabbies hand as I was leaving like he was the pope and cried
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
He dated a girl who could do the damn splits on his dick like how do you compete with that
It's like if you wanna bond just do a ropes course or have group sex you don't have to be weird about it
I want a dick in my left hand and a Crunch Wrap Supreme in my right hand.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
I just wanna be naked and go frolic in the snow
i'm sitting in my room 'bout to smoke a bowl. also, i found out that you don't need a permit to own a tiger in wisconsin, so we're buying one when we move in together.
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
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