No seriously, I have to sell the house because my wife found out I'm gay.
Just watched 1 guy 1 jar with my mom. Awkwardville...
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
The milf did the body paint, come to the bar
Stop touching yourself.
Wtf!?!?!?! Did you install a camera???
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
He wants to tie me naked and spread out on his table, press a vibrator to my clit and feed me ice cream.
That is my stoner wet dream!
I need a fuck buddy with more available hours
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I may or may not have been feeling patriotic and banged Captain America in a closet. SPOILER ALERT: We broke his shield
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