I think I am morally bankrupt
Okay call me later ill be watching lifetime and scrubbing throw up off my feet
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
yeah, but i heard shes schizophrenic
i wouldn't even care dude, i'd fuck her and all 7 of her personalities.
The freshman sure do fuck up the whataburger line at 2am
Let's have sex soon. Just us!! Its sad that I have to specify.
karaoke mosh pit has descended into fisticuffs, send backup
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
This late night dumpster diving sesh is making my quads cramp up
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
I'm glad you found someone that both loves you and is cool doing coke off your tits. Proud of you.
It was like mission impossible.
but with sex.
You kept crying and I couldnt help but laugh at you, I was really high though.
Randomize
