member when we used to take shits together before volleyball games?
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
My tally is now official: I have been drunk every weekend since 2008. Cheers.
I get drunk and say inappropriate things... you get drunk and sleep with inappropriate people. it's what we do.
Their wedding is on my 21st birthday. I fail to see a way that this could end poorly.
Great. I get laid, Leslie Nielsen dies. I can't have have sex anymore, the film community can't take another loss like this.
Dude I broke my bong in half this morning. I kicked it as I was jerking off. I would never hide anything from you.
I made her a sippy cup with eggnog and whiskey. My meditation app told me to go the extra mile for someone today, so I did.
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Can't a white girl just get drunk on a Sunday night and eat rice crispy treats. SHIT
My legacy here is being that tiny blonde girl that threw someone down and shouted "Fuck your face, I'm Dee Dee Ramone."
So the bar crawl I'm on is a "90s bar crawl" and I made the joke about a few overweight girls that "lack of concern for your weight is so 90s" it did not end well
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
i just remembered i drunk watched the brave little toaster last night
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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