How come twittering sounds sexual?
Because of Bambi.
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I got her a Nickelback box set.
okay, I promise to stop paying strippers to hit you
Yeah it was hard to find an opportunity while fucking him to say "oh the reason my lips taste so salty is because i blew your roomate 15 minutes ago"
I had this image of some guy in a taco truck down by the IMA accosting you for a peep show.
I had to break up with him he didn't understand my priorities. I'm sorry but Saturday nights are for pot and Doctor Who. I'm not going to change who I am.
Omg. I felt like a crazed animal last night. My lesbian instincts burned a hole in my panties.
I am broke enough to accept it. If I get poisoned, you can have my shoes
No. More. Tequila. Even the hot dog guy felt bad for me and you know that guy has seen some crazy shit.
I thought my period ended but I felt it again as soon as Pitbull started playing
One of the art pieces was basically this chick throwing raw meat at the audience, anyone who got hit (which I did) got a free shot of whiskey. It was worth it.
I didn't pop out of a cake in a speedo with diagrams
In case that's what u were picturing
I woke up with what appeared to be LSD in my pocket. Know anything about this?
Virgins should have to wear a badge. This burden is too heavy...
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