David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
We all need desperate help. Maybe we should just become a group of people who walk around town and shit in peoples air vents
I'm down.
I wrote a list of all my homework due in the next few weeks. I feel I've done enough for tonight.
i feel this outfit says i'm better than you, but i might give you a handjob behind a building
I vaguely remember taking a shit behind the shed before I started puking over the fence. No more Xanax.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
I just threw up again because I opened my eyes... God is laughing. I resorted to taking the Mexican Dramamine because I feel seasick from walking. Not helping.
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
Turns out the bartender I fucked is the bar owner. WHY THE FUCK DO I PAY FOR HALF MY DRINKS? IS SEX NOT TIP ENOUGH?
The cop told me I was the prettiest guy he'd arrested in a while. I'm still not sure if it was a come on or not.
Man, coughing on your period is like the biggest gamble a girl can make.
"fuck it, let's do moonshine" shouldn't be in ANYONE'S vocabulary.
Omg I just woke up. In the hallway outside my room. I know you had something to do with this
Gave a guy a blowjob in a convent. Place in hell is now secured...
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