I was so drunk last night, I had to Wikipedia what i did.
is it bad that the economy has gotten so bad that finding cheap gas gives me the same excitement and joy as finding a hot, blonde haired, blue eyed, tall, athletic single straight guy?
rainy day on campus = new personal fetish for girls in booty shorts and colorful rain boots
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
its freezing days like this when i seriously consider littering to speed up the global warming processes.
Don't freak out about the couches in the driveway. We tried to unpack the uhaul drunk.
Even though ive seen her get fisted by another girl at a party, shes still a doctor.
The walk home from the bar is FAR more shameful in daylight.
Like I had no idea he knew how to play girls the way he played me. His major is chemistry for christ's sake.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
My period started right as he was entering, which really helped me sell the "I've never done this before" bit.
He is into some weird shit i walked in his room last night he was waving his hard dick around hitting shit yellin cock fight
No I did not just post a Craigslist ad for a used stripper pole because I can't afford my own. But now that you put the idea in my head I might have to.
She's 90% sass and 10% boobs
Not to play devil's advocate, but, considering how our species has evolved so far... I'm kinda rooting for the sun on the whole heat death thing.
Randomize
