I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I wanted to dispute a few 411 charges on my phone bill. The service rep told me I called them four times asking for Lady Gaga's number.
somehow I got talked into dressing up like a hot dog, spinning around ten times, and shooting lay ups in front of thousands of students
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I mean I'm forever immortalized as the one who puked in his dad's straw hat.
I got lit on fire and andy went to jail last night. Totally unrelated incidents though.
It's all good. Going back to my room to try and air out my balls.
Does it qualify as sexting if you're both pretending to be fictional characters?
I'm not sure whether to be proud of you or weirded out.
I have walked into stripper central, but I'm on the street at 1:00 in the afternoon
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Accidentally made a bowl of macaroni and cheese with a bottle of vodka. It's not that bad
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
he's fucking insane. he's worse than me. is that even possible? I'm only with him because his dick is huge. I need Jesus.
Randomize
