How do i ask the guy i made out with for 4 hours if he is gay? He keeps telling me i'm so adorable and that he had a ''blasty''
i keep walking around campus wondering if anyone is as stoned as i am
well if I unknowingly shoved my hand up someones ass, I'm glad it was yours
andd if someone unknowingly shoved their hand up my ass without me knowing, im glad it was you
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
I'm buying you potatoes, the least you could do is not ask any fucking questions and just say thank you.
If we're single and alone together, the fuck angels shall sing upon our nude bodies.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
If I got everything I wanted in the world, I would have been forcing soup down your throat hours ago
He said he didnt want to choke me, I said im sorry thats a deal breaker.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
I literally ate pizza on a toilet and made up reasons as to why you should make out with that boy. I am unstoppable.
Pretty much all i've had today is sugar and orgasms
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Even in drag you're still better looking than your sister.
Randomize
