he is a creepy guy.
yea thats what heroine does to ppl.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
This kind of poor decision making requires a real cup, not a mason jar.
It was beyond pathetic. You yelled her name at every blonde chick we saw hoping it would be her. Then you puked your corn dog
You are the worst substitute drug dealer ever
I'm on my way, but at some point we're going to have to settle who gave who crabs the last time
Why do you have to go to the hospital?
I gotta apologize to a male nurse who's tryin to press assault charges on me
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Dude. You dropped to your knees and face planted into the rocks. And continued to talk on the phone and laugh. That's where those cuts came from.
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
So my POF profile is full of Archer references. Only guys who get them will be getting any response to their messages.
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
Stay home. Ain't nothing out in these mean streets but plan b and regret
Sometimes you wanna cuddle and sometimes you wanna get blown in the bathroom.
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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