Excuse me do you have gonnorhea?
hey is it cool if i invite some fat girls to the party so i can be the skinny one?
yeah okay. but if i take one home with me you have to come over in the morning and tell her to get her shit and go.
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
considering I showed up there after a xanax, 2 bottles of champagne and some coke, no shirt and someone else s husband... I'm sure you can figure that one out.
Oh my god I'm so bored. The virgin is so disinteresting when I'm not trying to cum on her face.
A stranger just came up to me and asked why I hadn't texted him, and if he was just a one night stand. I live for these moments.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
Completely smashed, masturbating to the view of the ocean. Family vacations are more tolerable than I thought
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
First week is awesome. Freshman girls prancing around everywhere like newborn baby deer looking for a dick to jump on
You are cordially invited to the annual finals week stress relief drinking binge at our manor this evening
Remember how I have such good luck that it's almost bullshit?
I'm afraid to ask, but go on.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
