i think the fact that he graduated high school the year i graduated elementary school is sexy.
The kid in front of me is videochatting and typing to his gf. I should make poop/sex faces over his shoulder, right?
i need to know the scientific term for a guy's taint so i can explain what i did last night.
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
all i remember was her shitting herself and asking me to call her parents.....i so didn't. when i woke up she was gone and left a note saying "we will be lovers forever"
I just dumped bong water and Bacardi out of my purse into the trash can. Everything in my purse is soaked. I hate Sundays.
Just saw a man downtown with a cat just riding on his shoulder like a furry parrot. He may be homeless, but I think he's your soul mate.
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
Wanna see if we can get cut off at bdubs again? The same hipster manager that is younger than us is working again
That's so awful of me. Instead of comforting her I masturbated in front of my ex-boyfriend.
My sack is cleanly shaven and the rest of my body has been manscaped. i even put aftershave on my junk. i feel sleek like a fighter jet right now.
I miss my innocence.
I miss being able to say, "I've never done this before."
I'm going to be there later than expected. There was a yo-yo incident...
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