oh yeah I'm gonna practice throwing up so I can be ready for Friday night. and Saturday. Beth is back, diaper and all.
i may or may not be dressed up as my farmville farmer. gonna harvest some ladiesss tonight!!!
By connection do you mean me drunkenly grinding my ass on his lap for an extended period of time? If so, then yes, we had a "connection"
I'm the only kid serving jury duty. And I'm the only one who may walk out of here in handcuffs for a warrant. I'm enabling these people to doubt America's youth once again.
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
I bet it kind of sucks while you do community service I'm getting blown in the shower. haha
I'm just walking around Lowe's groping the carpets....
We can Fuck in the shower to save time
And this is why I like you. You're so damn innovative.
Chose not to courtesy flush and the CEO huffed the result. I feel powerful.
I can hear my family downstairs singing Christmas carols as I masturbate
I just wanted to be the best at what I did even if that included sexing a whole fraternity or sorority ya know?
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Soooooo I may or may not have accidentally been a catalyst in a destroyed marriage.
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
The fact our science teacher from high school was buying us drinks and hitting on me doesn't matter.
Randomize
