OMG Im so trashed fishy! im sitting hereon my bed wif mcdonalds n i look like david hasselhoff!!!!!! kill me now
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
A guy at the bar bought me a jag bomb because I'm the chick that frosts his donuts at KT. Never have I been more proud of being a failure at life.
I really wish you were half the slut you're sister was in college
We left an ass print on the piano.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
No it was after you showed us his fraternaty letters shaven out of your pubes
I think they were making kool-aid in my bed. There is lots of sugar and my hands and face are stained blue.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
One of those days. Also, your pants are now in my protective custody.
Nipple rings and loofahs DO NOT mix.
The chances of me making out with someone next weekend are about the same as me not remembering it.
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Randomize