I got her a Nickelback box set.
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
I just made my bed perfectly before realizing that I'll be too drunk to appreciate it tonight
Then he complimented me on how excellent I was at breathing through my nose
I think I'm getting too used to throwing up in the reception trash can. It doesn't even phase me anymore
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
nope, if she's going to skank it up with ginge-a-saurus douche she deserves the silent treatment.
I'm not leaving bed today. And i guess my drunken ass last night hit my roommate in the face with a tiki torch then proceeded to cry while carrying around a picture of he who must not being name. I'm a piece of work.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
He's thawing a cheesecake on his stomach. We're that high.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
You told him about your cats? I told his friend to put his dick in my mouth, and you talked about cats!?
Hey, YOU try working out drunk every night! Besides, I think at least one of those bruises is a hickey.
And then she proceeded to tell us that blowing your brother made her feel like part of the family. At this point you were still pretending to be a cat. Need I give another reason she can't live with us?
I kicked down a wall in rage and found a door behind the drywall. Once again vandalism solves all my problems.
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