i just spent the last half hour thinking about my totally irrational and intense hatred of wedge flip flops.
Call me in 2 minutes and go along with what I say. You're hysterical and I must go comfort you asap. He just asked if I was ready to experience sex with a wizard and he wasnt kidding.
Why is there a shirtless guy in Walgreens and why is he probably looking for the same thing I am?
I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
Had to snap chat three different people to ask who left the bite mark on my thigh. All three said "Wasn't me". Now I can't wear a bathing suit to my mom's pool.
Just shaved my crotch so I could call it the bald eagle. Happy 4th.
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
...I just added shower water to my vodka on ice\n#sendhelp
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
You stole my car to go to your boyfriends. Now your parents are fucking in the next room at top volume, and I have no way to escape..thought you should know that the amount of therapy I'll be needing for this is expensive.
You're the best friend ever.
Randomize