After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
I just packed a bowl in my room and use glad press n' seal to cover it so it wouldn't dump out in my pocket .
James and whatshisface bought me drunks. I am drinks.
Dude she threw his clothes out n 8th floor window and her dog tried to bite his dick off. So the answer is yes it could be worse...
he was alternating between taking bites of butter and bagel. he said it was easier than finding a knife
Santa brought me a 1.75 of wine, and a liter of patron. I probably won't remember Christmas, so don't ask me how it was tomorrow.
He ate me out in the forest at that park we used to hit my bong in highschool again, somehow this isn't what I pictured being 25 would be like
How did you not realize the handbrakes were stuck?
I thought I was just out of shape.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
so much tequila, so little girl.
i can't hookup with him because someone else bit my vagina
I didn't realize how hungover I was until I fell asleep in my math lecture, and woke up I'm my history class. How is got there still remains a mystery...
i'm extremely hungover on the ski bus and the driver is playing abba. this. is. not. okay.
Nxt time we drink that much, we'll have to hide the crayons. Crayola-ing a mural on the living room wall wasnt the brightest idea, but it sure is classy. Right?
Like bruh, I’m a free range girlfriend
Randomize
