they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
I just puked in the mop bucket at work. I think I need to go home.
So I just told the bartender I would go down on her. You need to get here
some asshole was waslkibg around with ab electric razor and shaving parts of peoples heads.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
Someone just told me I could double date with them and their dog as my date. This is why the suicide rates are so high at the holidays.
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
most desperate stoner moment might have been when we filled the bong up with pond water
desperate times, desperate measures
I almost spit out my drink. But only almost, because it was vodka. And you don't spit out vodka.
i would never take his side over yours. you coulda gotten knocked up from another dude and i'd be right there next to you blaming it on him saying some shit like "his sperm were just too sub par for you" or "shoulda had a bigger penis"
what a fun peer-pressure-filled weekend
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
Totally on the hot mess express last night. Mom said I was passed out on her kitchen floor. Told her I was drinking genuine tea.
Are you opposed to me trying out your penis?
I had the good sense not to tell her that my summer goal is to get fucked by a med student while wearing a party dress and sparkly shoes
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