no but I have been chillin' like em' homeboys in the rainforest yo!
Apparently every Tri-Delt knows what I did and I am blacklisted from ever dating anyone in that house.
Well ya you lied, told her you cared, took her virginity and then broke up with her at Christies Toy Box.
I honestly thought the dildo was a nice parting gift.
I only knew it was midnight because i got happy new years texts while i puked outside
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
She had a baby and now works at Hooters. She is the poster child for peaking in high school.
My catholic guilt is strong, but the alcohol is stronger.
What if I told you that I had 160 ounces of cheap malt liquor in my backpack? Espn films 40 for 40s presents: Edward 40 hands. Our room. 11PM/10 central
Now I don't feel so bad about telling everyone that he's 23 and needs Viagra. It's her problem now
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
Did you ever think you lost your bong and then you find it in the weirdest place? I mean, who leaves their bong in the shower?
I found three naked dudes in your bed this morning. Did we have a really weird break in or do you need to tell me something?
Thank you for stroking my rage monster tonight.
When your job has killed your spirit to the point that you don't want to flirt with the cute, tall guy at Enterprise
GIRL PLEASE. GO BACK AND POP THE TITTY OUT
I don't know, we got really drunk and I slapped her with an ear of corn.
the last thing is remember is that strange guy in the leotard...i woke up in my bed, naked, with a half eaten grilled cheese on my nightstand, a six pack in the fridge, a new pack of cigarettes on my pillow and coke in my purse. apparently i bought some drugs, shopped and cooked. typical.
Randomize
