First thing she said after sex was.. are you baptised by chance?
i just made out with my boyfriends father...and so did jess
i just licked my manager on accident and i'm freaking out
You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Ummm I just broke my no puke streak at church
hey dude come in here and see how much of my beard i can put in my mouth!
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
Also, yes, I look pretty rough. But my ovaries fought back this morning so getting dressed decently was not a priority.
HES DOING PULLUPS BE STILL MY BEATING HEART
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
She told me having sex was our civic duty. How can I not love her?
Life lesson: if a hot naked girl tells you to spit on something, you spit on it. No questions.
The dicks good but it's not two trains and a bus good.
To get him to come she paid for his uber and promised that someone in the house would give him head. it worked
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