Is it bad that everytime I read or hear "Woo Hoo" I immediately think of sex because of The Sims?
He tagged himself in all of my pictures so he would get a notification if someone commented on it.
Restraining orders are what college is about.
he just invited me over for the 3 p's...pepsi pizza and porn...I'm gonna marry him
I mean, keeping the tube socks on AND taking cell phone pictures that he didn't ask for during sex? that's two strikes kiddo.
SEE! I KNEW I HAD A LONG-TERM REASON FOR BEING A SLUT!
He thought the strainer was a giant bowl to puke in.
She called picking up at 2pm a matinee drug deal.
You did this to me with your delicious pizza and moonshine.
I'll forgive you once we're drunk again by noon.
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
My life is sponsored by tidy cat kitty litter, Bacardi rum, and plan b.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
apparently I like to do this thing where I wear pretty dresses and then pee on things on public. Picture proof. Four times last week.
I just lost my handcuff virginity and not in the sexy way.
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
Randomize
