one might say we're banned from that church
If a young child walked up to you and grabbed your penis, you'd feel violated too.
i lost my airplane ticket and tried to board with a bar receipt in all the confusion. i have officially lost all brain cells in college.
laying naked on couch sucking water through straw. i can still feel the orgasm from last night. thank you mdma.
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
Why are you surprised? I've only ever liked older guys since I was a 3 yr old crushing on her pediatrician.
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
that is terrible, if I can't drink Gatorade when I'm hungover I don't wanna live in this world. that's like denying wild rams to run free in the wild and frolic
Is there some sort of line being crossed when your shower activities start to involve jimmy johns?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
Remember the girl I had sex with in the dorm stairwell? She got married!
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Like I could never be a lawyer because I would just look like a porn star impersonation of a lawyer.
Did you send me a cake saying 'Happy 1st One-Night Stand Ever'?
Don't judge me 👊🏼 his dick just whispers my name
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